This has been a tough lesson for me and one I am still learning. As humans it’s natural for us to form attachments to people, animals, objects, and ideas. With attachment comes suffering. Being able to let go of expectations or things that have happened in the past can bring forth a freedom that not many people truly experience.
I don’t believe that we will ever be able to eliminate all suffering but I do believe that we can limit the places we let it enter into our lives by how we respond to things that are happening around us and to us. When we resist something that is clearly going to happen or has already happened then we invite suffering. When we fight so hard against what is happening it creates pain. We can never feel peace this way, there will always be a war going on inside of us. That is a miserable way to live.
There have been so many things that have happened in my past that I have resented and, honestly, I’m still not sure I have worked through all of it. It is something I am very much aware of. Whenever I feel those thoughts and feelings start to creep in I stop immediately and realize what is happening. I look at those thoughts, I feel them and I release them. All of this just takes a moment and by doing this I do not give these thoughts and feelings the power to affect my mood, my day, my life. We can go from feeling on cloud 9 to the depths of despair with just one dysfunctional thought. When we get attached to an ideal of how we thought something should have worked out, or how we have been hurt in the past, or how we have hurt someone else it can be a struggle to let that go. We need to be able to walk away from habits and ideas that no longer add value to our lives. As long as we fight to hang on to something that we think we want or never really had to begin with and resist moving forward we will feel pain every single day.
Living a non-attached life does not mean that you give up your desires and deep connections, it
“means receiving what is happening, without resisting. We hold our desires very lightly and stay open to what actually occurs. Even if it is the last thing we would ever want to happen.” ~Gail Brenner
To truly enjoy every moment of our lives we have to be okay with letting go. A healthy amount of attachment means making room for an equal amount of detachment.
“You need to be able to hold on and let go at the same time.” ~David Truman
It’s ok to let things flow through our lives, not everything is meant to stay.
Is there an area in your life where you need to practice being less attached?